the jOurNey continues...

Salam.

"macam mane tempat baru? ok ke?" . today, almost all ppl that i know ask me that question.~kebetulan hari ni ada cme kat Hosp~.. duh!? bila dorang tanye soalan tu, my expression kinda distorted.. and i give that boring-kinda-annoying look... please la.. ask other question bleh x? im tired of giving ppl the excuse of not being happy working at my new place. if i said ,"x best la.. nak balik hosp", they will definitely say, "ala..biasela tu..tpt baru. lama2 best la tu". seriously ppl, what do u know? only me and myself yg tau mcm mane rase keje kat tpt yg u don't even feel that u fit in there. like wearing other ppl's clothes. thats how i felt for the past 2 month. those who get their place of choice, they don't have the courtesy to comfort or konon-konon-empati ngan aku. and to make it worse, those who called themself myfren doesn't even bother to ask how im doing... not to be a snobby princess, but just calling and asking, "cmne keje skang? jom kita kuar..mkn2 ke..",that wud be enuf. just need a fren to let out my ketidakpuasan-perasaan ni. how wud u feel living (~yeah, working is like living, u spent 8 hours @work~) in a place without a fren around, ppl just barging into ur room asking for everything, works that seems to have no end to it, skipping lunch almost everyday bcoz u dont have anyone to lunched with, and etc... just imagine... this situation is stressing me out... afraid that i may develop some kind of depressive disorder... nauzubillah.. amin.

p/s: to that person that sent me out 'there', i thank you... thank you for making my life a living h**l...

The Confusion...

Hye there!!

Dah lame x meng'update' blog ni.. bukan ape.. xde ape2 yg memerlukan luahan perasaan kat sini.. haha..
Ape yg aku rase skarang ni adalah keliru yg teramat sgt..
keliru ngan perasaan sendiri..
i've been there a few years back.. and i hate that confusing feeling so much..
im afraid that i might take the same decision i took at that time and i hurt that person's feeling..deeply.
so, sorry if i were to hurt your feeling...in the future..
all because im confused with my own feeling..
be brave,aimi..
sorry..cause i had so many other things to think of, besides this feeling thing..
after all,
may the best man win!!

if you are the best man, for me, then u'll definitely win..

Post k-drama effect...

Hye..!
Just finished watching korean drama ~cinderella man~... quite nice story (plus tersangatlah hensem hero..hehe)..
But, i must admit that it get to me every time i watch korean drama..that feeling, the undescribable(is there such word? bantai je la..=)) feeling... suddenly i feel the need to have a boyfren... to be in love.. and mcm2 lg.. means that that drama berjaya membuai perasaan yg menontonnya...huh! terer betol org korea ni wat cite.. dah la hero comel + hensem, cite best, ost best, ending best... tapi satu yg aku kagum org korea ni, dorg tersangatlah bangga ngan negara dorg.. dlm every drama, dorg akan masukkan sekali tempat2 menarik kat negara dorg, and culture dorg.. for example, dlm cite yg aku baru tgk ni, fokus dlm cite ni adalah 'dongdaemun market'. kat korea, market ni boleh la kira mcm pusat fesyen yg sgt besar, yg mana semua process yg terlibat dlm pembuatan sehelai baju berlaku kat sini.. dari designing, pemilihan fabrik, jahitan, aksesori --> and menariknya, sehelai baju tu boleh dihasilkan dlm masa 1 hari je.. really wish that someday aku boleh pg sana n pg tpt2 yg slalu tgk dlm cite korea... mcm jeju island, dongdaemun market (aka great east gate), muzium bear etc... (kot2 la ada org nk sponsor aku..haha!)and yg penting, nk cuci mata ngan kot-mi-nam kat sana...

~a man with a suit is the handsomest of all~



...boleh x tlg cari sorg yg mcm ni (kalo ada la kat msia ni...)

Stress Level Rising...ALERT!!!

as the title implies, im in a very very stress mood rite now..why? semestinya disebabkan penempatan baru di Hulu trg.. hmm
byk sebab aku stress ngan tpt baru ni..
1. it is HULU trg..what do u expect??
2. byk keje management..no more ward rounds, counseling, dispensing, screening...huargh!!!
3. aku sorg2 terkontang kanting, xde kwn sorg pon..
4. xreti...mcm kena blaja dari awal balik..
5. not my type.. seme ilmu yg blaja 4 5 tahun, xberguna..

i think i might be getting a severe depressive disorder if perasaan ni berlarutan lama... giler aku..
mcm mane nk paksa diri supaya suka ek?
dah la xsuka sgt farmasi ni, and bile at last, i like something in pharmacy (it's clinical pmacy and not some PKD-pmacy..huh!)...it was taken away from me..so unfair!!
kdg2 rasa jeles ngan faez.. she got what she wants..lucky her..
ada sape2 x nk shift tpt ngan aku?

the gud ol' hobby...

this few days.. i have been doing what i haven't been doing for a long time.. reading story book!!
haha... in da past, dis was my madness.. buying 3-4 story books every month n just lying on my bed, reading books.
just finished reading cecilia ahern's "where rainbows end".. a very interesting style of writing.. the author presents the story in a very unique way, i can say. she tells the story through SMS and YM style.. means that there's no dialogue in it.. just exchange-SMS,instant Messenger and letters.
i wanna quote one of my fav paragraph in dis book..
in a letter from Alex to Rosie, he said that

" you deserves someone who loves you with every single beat of his heart, someone who thinks about you constantly, who spends every minute of every day wondering what you're doing, where u are, who u're with, and if u're doing OK. u need someone who can help u reach ur dream and who can protect u from ur fears. u need someone who treat u with respect, and love every part of u, esp ur flaws. u shud be wif someone who can make u happy, really happy, dancing-on-air happy...."

it is so romantic, but yet so true... hmm, still waiting for someone to say that lines above for me..
and ah.. back to the story, it's a happy ending (obviously..!) the two best fren end up falling in love wif each other and finally get together when they're 50!~!
overall..really loved the storyline..plus the ending and the words in it.
i give dis book 5 *...haha!

Sarang~love~cinta~pyaar...

Warning!! ~ This post is just for self expressing... dont judge me based on what i wrote here...

Haha.. mcm la ramai sgt yg bace blog aku ni.. tp bagus gak xramai yg bace.. so, bleh la aku mengarut byk2 sket... n x ramai yg nak kutuk blog aku..
ish..dah menyimpang jauh dr ape yg aku nk tulis/type.
Current mode: depressed, due to much wedding-exposure.. bcoz ppl keep asking when and when..
When? even me myself x tau bile.. My parents keep on match-making me with this-person's son, this-relative's son, and i keep on rejecting all of them.. why do ppl always keep in their mind, that when you start working,then you must start preparing to get married. it's not that i'm not into marriage, it's just that now is not the right time..for me.
i WILL get married if i meet someone that can take care of me, someone that can complete me, someone that accept me for who i am.. and most importantly, someone who speaks what he thinks...and oh! he also must accept my korean-madness-ness.
Susah jadi anak dara ni..org keliling asyik tanye je..bila lagi? aku tak nak kawen just bcoz i have to... org kate xpe, lepas kawen baru bercinta.. but, bagi aku, how can u love someone that u dont even know whether u can love him or not? just another fairytale-theory. what if lepas kawin baru sedar x serasi? so unfair to us girls.. why do guys get to choose their ladies?

Now i understand that annoying feeling...
and to my prince charming, please hurry up and find me...

Sebuah Kehilangan...

Tanggal 31 Mei 2009, jam 8 pg, perginya seorang ibu saudara yang amat dikasihi...pergi mengadap yang Maha Kuasa. Betapa besarnya kuasa Ilahi, seseorang manusia itu boleh dipanggil menemui-Nya bila2 masa saja... masyaAllah..
Pertama kali menyaksikan bagaimana seseorang di ambang maut, amatlah menginsafkan... dalam dua nafas sahaja, nyawa boleh dicabut dari badan yang dihuni... Innalillahi wa Innailaihi raji'un...

Mak Ngah,
pemergianmu ditangisi...
kehilanganmu dirasai..
ketiadaanmu kami redhai..
untukmu kami sedekahi..
doa untuk bekalan di sana nanti...
Amin.

Di sebalik kesedihan yang dirasai, tahniah diucapkan kepada Abg Bee...berjaya akhirnya menukar gelaran bujangnya kepada 'suami kak syafinaz' ...hehe! sekitar majlis akad nikah di bukit rimau...







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